Balm for Wounds: Apologizing in Advance

For the Times I Fall Short

If you’re new to Raising Myles, Welcome!

I write letters to my newborn son, Myles, sharing my journey as a first-time dad and spreading the love I didn't experience myself. If you’ve been here before — thank you for coming back. If you’re new here, below are some good places to start:

• How I Met Your Mother

• Tell them Where You’re From

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A special shoutout to our newest paid subscriber: Sydney! Thank you!

While I don't rely on people paying, all funds collected from this project go towards my son's college savings. Consider upgrading your subscription because college ain’t cheap. These letters are $8 a month—that’s cheaper than a pizza and a drink in a gentrified neighborhood.

If you can’t commit to a monthly subscription, but still want to support, here is my Buy Me a Coffee page.

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I started writing Myles short poems that I read out loud. They’ve been fun and healing. You can now find them all here. Some letters to him really serve as a reminder of why I started these letters in the first place. The one below is a grounding one for me.

This is for the time when I'll say, "Do as I say, not as I do."

32 Weeks Old

Dear Myles,
I wish someone
wrote me letters 
when I was young. 
I would have used them as mirrors
For all the times  people professed to love me with their lips, 
but failed to show me in their ways 

Let these letters 
serve as balms for wounds 
the world will cause 

I’m casting the net 
before you fall
The ambulance is here
if you break 

I hope you find them when you need them 
Some light, some heavy, some even funny 

Turn to them 
Especially when 
my lips, and ways 
do not align 

I’m healing, as I’m raising you 
In therapy, while I’m writing you

Please, 
never question my love 

But forgive me, in advance 
I desperately needed someone 
to write for me

This is why I write,
For you

Love, 
Daddy

And if you’re on Substack Notes, and this this letter resonated with you, please hit that“Restack” button.

Take a deep breath… and let me know your thoughts:

1. Has someone not apologized to you for something they did? How are you working through that?

2. What have you had to apologize in advance for?

3. Do you give yourself enough grace? What does that look like for you?

4. When’s the last time someone wrote you something that made you feel cared for or loved?

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These letters between me and Myles are currently free to read.

But if you want to support, consider becoming a paid subscriber.

All proceeds collected from Raising Myles contributes to his College Plan. If you can’t commit to a monthly subscription, but still want to support, here is my Buy Me a Coffee page.

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Want more of Myles’ Letters?

• Here’s the most recent one - A Shirtless Night

• Last week you met your Grandfather

• Read about My Wife’s Love Affair - It’s exactly what you don’t think

• Have you ever been Cooking in the Bathroom kind of tired?

• Check out Carrying the Gift, Holding the Love

• Read about Our first Father’s Day.