I had a supervisor who would often say about our work with clients if we feel like we messed something up, said the wrong thing, but I think it applies to most relationships, “It’s never too late to go back to that.” I think of this often in parenting.
Yes, there’s always room for improvement or creating an opportunity. I think ALOT about this being an awareness though. I think about my own dad and question why isn’t he aware that there is always an opportunity?
It’s such a heartbreaking and worthwhile question. Is it a lack of an awareness? Is it a belief that there is no repair adequate enough? Is it the power of shame?
Regardless the answer, you are deeply deserving of that repair.
My boys are 32 and 30 now but I'm still excoriating myself for mistakes I made. When I try to apologize for whatever has bubbled up at 3 a.m., invariably the response is A)I don't remember that OR B) Mom, that's why I was able to do _____.
It's useless for anyone to tell me to be tender to myself but I'll offer that to you - please be gentle and kind with yourself.
Thank you for sharing, Sylvia. Seeing this 30 years down the line is beautiful. Your boys sound wonderful and so self aware. Sounds like you did an amazing job.
Marc, this is so touching, felt it in my soul. I am writing poetry for the first time these days, there is something this form can do to express ourselves that long from prose can’t, some ineffable quality that goes straight to the heart of the matter. That’s exactly what you’ve done here. Lucky little Myles. Waking up to a dad so committed to make it right, for him.💗
What he'll know for sure is that your love and motivation was intentional. Years from now if this conversation comes up with him I believe what he'll respond with is a calm and understanding grace. He'll do that because you were so intentional and did the best you could as much of the time as you could. At some point in his life he'll need to grow in that understanding. It's what will help him be the kind of dad he had... not perfect but completely "in".. good job, daddy. It's all a part of parenting and relationships in general. You've got this. Also, maybe a little gummy wouldn't be a bad idea. 😉
🥹🥹 beautiful (and relatable)
I had a supervisor who would often say about our work with clients if we feel like we messed something up, said the wrong thing, but I think it applies to most relationships, “It’s never too late to go back to that.” I think of this often in parenting.
Yes, there’s always room for improvement or creating an opportunity. I think ALOT about this being an awareness though. I think about my own dad and question why isn’t he aware that there is always an opportunity?
It’s such a heartbreaking and worthwhile question. Is it a lack of an awareness? Is it a belief that there is no repair adequate enough? Is it the power of shame?
Regardless the answer, you are deeply deserving of that repair.
Me, too. Me, too.
My boys are 32 and 30 now but I'm still excoriating myself for mistakes I made. When I try to apologize for whatever has bubbled up at 3 a.m., invariably the response is A)I don't remember that OR B) Mom, that's why I was able to do _____.
It's useless for anyone to tell me to be tender to myself but I'll offer that to you - please be gentle and kind with yourself.
Sending you love. Sylvia
Thank you for sharing, Sylvia. Seeing this 30 years down the line is beautiful. Your boys sound wonderful and so self aware. Sounds like you did an amazing job.
I’m in awe of your writing every time.
Marc, this is so touching, felt it in my soul. I am writing poetry for the first time these days, there is something this form can do to express ourselves that long from prose can’t, some ineffable quality that goes straight to the heart of the matter. That’s exactly what you’ve done here. Lucky little Myles. Waking up to a dad so committed to make it right, for him.💗
What he'll know for sure is that your love and motivation was intentional. Years from now if this conversation comes up with him I believe what he'll respond with is a calm and understanding grace. He'll do that because you were so intentional and did the best you could as much of the time as you could. At some point in his life he'll need to grow in that understanding. It's what will help him be the kind of dad he had... not perfect but completely "in".. good job, daddy. It's all a part of parenting and relationships in general. You've got this. Also, maybe a little gummy wouldn't be a bad idea. 😉